Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Roller Derby DaNae....

I love my wife.  I think she is amazing.

It is Wednesday and I could make a list of all the amazing things she does that makes her so amazing, but I won't.  Today I'm going to write the list of reasons I think my wife should start a roller-derby league here in the Manhattan, KS area (I'm assuming from a brief web search that there isn't one).

  1. Planning:  My wife loves to plan and organize things.  I don't get it, it drives me nuts sometimes.  I'm not into planning, I'd rather just go do something.  I think putting together a roller-derby league would give her the planning fix she so often needs due to my non-committal tendencies when it comes to plans.
  2. Toughing up:  the first year of our marriage, DaNae cried about once every four days.  The second year was down to about once every three weeks and year three was less than once a month.  Almost all of those cries have been because of her husband, me. And during year four I can only remember two times that I made her cry.  So marriage has already toughened her up some, but I think she could still be less of a wuss in some matters (like when coming into contact with spiders) and roller-derbying would do that for her.
  3. Exercise:  DaNae hates her body despite the fact that I love it.  She always proclaims 'how bad she's been'  or how 'she needs to get back on the ball' and sometimes she replaces the ball with a wagon.  I don't get it.  But what I do get is that whatever she tries eventually gets put aside and some gleaming new thing catches her eye like some new contraption that'll dissolve that fat away like it was butter, or some new exercise routine that some person tries to instruct you on via DVD.  I think her problem is boredom.  I'd get bored (and frustrated) if I tried to follow along with some ripped person dancing around on the television.  I think getting into the ring with a bunch of ladies and going round and round, while trying not to get bumped off or clothes lined would fill that exercise need and prevent that deadly onslaught of boredom which so often knocks her off whatever track or ball or wagon she might be on.
  4. Aggression: She says she isn't aggressive enough to play a sport like this.  I think its a lie. I don't know anyone who isn't aggressive in some way.  We all are, and I think if she had the chance to throw an elbow into someone else's face than she would be happier on a whole than she is now.  Maybe it would give her the confidence to chase after what she really wants.
  5. Sex appeal:  I'll be honest, I think she would look hot throwing elbows and bumping other ladies off the track while moving around on eight wheels.  
  6. Role model:  I think it would be a great influence on our daughter for her to see her mom active and out of the house while possibly knocking some other ladies teeth out and showing good sportsmanship.  
These are the six reasons that popped into my head over the last you have a good reason that might encourage my wife to trade in her shoes for new ones that have wheels attached?

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