Monday, April 8, 2013

Musical Chairs...

...with the Scoffers!

Ever read something like a million times and then one day you read it and decide to look up one of the words, which you always assumed you knew, to find out what it means.  And then once you do so the thing you have been reading takes on a whole new light? 

Psalm 1:1 "Blessed is the man who....[doesn't] sit in the seat of scoffers."

I mean seriously I hadn't realized that I had taken the Scoffers' chair.  I will gladly give it back and find my own to sit in.  I prefer to be the blessed man, versus the seat stealer!

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Wearied by man....

...can't chase the horses!

I want to go to the moon!  Literally. 

But let me step back a day and tell you why I bring that up.  I struggle with my perception of other's idiocy.  I'm not saying that those people that I struggle with are idiots, I'm just saying that in my pride I see them as such and then I struggle with their actions internally, often causing massive amounts of stress for myself and sometimes poor responses on my part. 

So last night I was driving home from job number two where there are multiple occasions to view other people's actions as idiocy (Thank God for the sanctification power of retail).  And from my aerie of pride I got frustrated with an individual who changed a policy because of what looks like spite.  I got frustrated mostly because it impacted me and others I like in a negative way (and productivity as a whole).  I fumed silently and on my drive home I pondered why I held on to that stuff so much.  Why I let others frustrate me so much.  And then I saw the moon!

It was a full moon.  The sky and surrounding plains were lit up like the Las Vegas strip at night,  maybe a wee bit less garish.  And I was struck by how small it looked yet how massive it really was all at the same time.  I wanted to run across its face and let the moon dust sift between my fingers and just bask in the glory of God as I experience something he created that isn't much tainted by all of us.  I wanted to explore all his creation and discover just how intricate he made it all.   

Then it hit me that it'll be a long journey there if I continue to let others frustrate me so.  I am reminded of a play in my heart that has been growing for the last couple weeks.  A play that calls me to greater worship of something far bigger than myself.  And I am struck small again and it feels good and refreshing. 

As I was reading a passage from Jeremiah today, and Jeremiah complains to God about the usual woes and then God responds:

"If you have raced with men on foot, and they have wearied you,
how will you compete with horses?" Jeremiah 12:5
I want to compete with horses!  I want to go to the moon!  I want to not live a life frustrated!   

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Awakened... the heart!

Psalm 67:1
 May God be gracious to us and bless us
    and make his face to shine upon us, Selah

'nuff said for today.  

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

The ants go marching...

...two by two!

Okay, this has nothing to do with my former adventures in pest control (summary of said adventures).  This actually deals more with personal desires.  They always say that you should set a time to do such and such and then stick to it!  Usually this involves exercise or daily devotions and usually they tell you to do that at 5 am or something similarly ridiculous. 

I have discovered that the morning was not made for me, but maybe its for all those type A go-getters out there in the world. I'm not type A.  I don't think I can even transform into a type A person if I wanted to.  I don't have that desire, so life is good.  That actually makes me think of this:

Yeah, that dude isn't going to make it!

I've tried doing the early morning thing, but my bed has this gravitational pull that is so strong that even if I do leave its comfort, my brain stays with it in spirit.  Ask my wife how responsive I am in the wee hours.  She asked me the other day what time I came back to bed after comforting our older daughter who decided to wake up crying, very early in the morning.  I don't recall even leaving our bedroom. 

So usually I scoff at this advice, but today I've decided to try it.  It won't be an early morning thing, because I want to write everyday and if I tried to demand that I write something first thing in the morning, my writing would be more incomprehensible than my two year-old's drawings. 

My goal is two sentences written or wrote, damn I hate verbs, by two in the afternoon.  2 x 2.   You might be thinking, Whoa, Bill, don't over do it!  And I might smirk at your smart-ass nature, and then explain to you that most days when I get over the blankness of the page and actually start writing, it just starts flowing and before I know it, a page is filled.  Much like this blog post that seems to be running on and on.  I started writing today at 1:48pm and haven't stopped and that was twenty minutes ago.  Its about momentum and I like it. 

So if you see me and its three o'clock in the afternoon, feel free to ask if I got my two in for the day!

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

The bug...

...that really isn't a bug.

I wrote yesterday and today.  I had to come up with a fictional movie in my work of fiction.  I named it the Metroplex of Doom.  I kind of wish it were a real movie.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

The desert...

...and the itch!

I hate winter.  I actually dig the cooler weather.  I miss the snow here in Kansas, though when it does snow I miss having a dry driveway.  The thing that I hate about winter is the mental miasma I hit every winter.  There is a refreshing newness each spring which at some point begins to thaw my thoughts.  I begin to have hope and ideas renewed.

If I could bottle it I would, but of course if rainbows were just unicorns farting then we would see more single horned horses.

I want to write, yet I waste my time looking for some new toy, playing some stupid game, or mentally strangling some nuisance.  There are lots of ideas streaming through my head at any given moment but fear holds me back.  As I write this I want to delete it because it seems dull and uninteresting but I am thinking I need to post it just to get out of the rut of not writing.

I want to set goals to write and finish some stories, but I suck at goals and then I get distracted and it doesn't happen I feel bad and wished it was physically possible to kick my own butt.  So what do I do? How do I self-motivate when the voice of fear and procrastination scream louder than both my daughters combined?

I'll let you know when I finally figure out a way to scratch that itch....